Where you at?

First run of winter vacation this morning.  As I crunched through the quiet early morning air negotiating drifts, ice patches, and chunks of snow leftover from Wednesday’s storm I passed numerous homes just waking up.  Christmas tree lights shining through front windows like little mini-lighthouses in the residential areas, a delivery truck bringing supplies to Taco John’s on 48th street, billows of smoke and steam escaping chimney and smokestacks, the glow of morning television bathing living rooms all marking the start of a new day.

I might occasionally cross paths with a morning walker (rarely) or other early morning runners (thankfully I am not the only one stupid/stubborn/committed enough to be out of a warm bed).  I might say hi to someone grabbing their copy of the Journal Star with coffee mug in hand.

my old Facebook profile pic.  Sums up how I feel about myself yesterday
my old Facebook profile pic. Sums up how I feel about myself yesterday

Among all of this, in the quiet moments of a solo run, I have a thought that is far from endearing, “I am better than these people”.  I am out here at X:XX a.m. putting in miles while you are barely out of bed.  By the time you even leave your house I will have put in so many minutes of running or core work or whatever that I am somehow superior to you. During my run I might compose my running log for the day to make it sound like an epic run. If I posted my workouts to Facebook or Twitter I might think about a photo I could put up or some way to phrase the post to encourage more thumbs up or likes to stoke my ego.  I will admit to all of these.

I will then to myself to shut the hell up and just run because who I am to think I am “better”.  Yep I am out there running, good for me.  But that lady grabbing her paper may have just come off third shift.  That light on in the living room might be someone trying out P90x for the first time to try and get in shape and they are just finishing their workout. Odds are really good that someone, somewhere ran faster and further and earlier on a tougher course than I did, so maybe my log should just be the facts of my run.  I am superior to nobody except one person.

After my run, I am superior to the runner I was yesterday.  That is what I get to measure myself against.  So as I tip toe from clear patch of pavement to snow pack I DO get to talk some smack.  I leave a footprint in the snow or a bit of spit behind for yesterday’s me to notice and think about.  Daily improvement and learning, in Japanese it is loosely translated as “kaizen”.  In that sense I am better.

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